Techno
by slam a revolving door
Summary: This is a traumatic yet wonderful year in the lives of all of Jane Austen's characters. Join them as they communicate to each other the infuriating and wonderful events in the year. Concentrating mainly on Pride and Prejudice.
1. Chapter 1

Techno 

**Disclaimer: **Not JA, do not own any of her works.

**A/N: **I realize that it's unlikely that they would, on an msn convo, not use shortcuts, e.g. u etc., but I have a thing about spelling. Sorry!

**MSN conversation between Janeand Lizzy says:**

**Jane** says:

Hey Liz!

**Holidays!** says:

1 more day…ONE MORE DAY!

**Jane** says:

I'm guessing you're excited about the holidays

**Holidays!** says:

Oh, Einstein.

**Jane** says:

Well, I can't wait for you to come home. Dad's been happier all week.

**Holidays!** says:

I can't wait to see you guys either. How's uni over there?

**Jane** says:

Great…

**Holidays!** says:

Okay, what happened?

**Jane** says:

Liam dumped me.

**Holidays!** says:

Oh Jane…

**Jane** says:

I'm fine. Really.

**Holidays!** says:

Pfft. You expect me to believe that?

**Jane** says:

I met someone.

**Holidays!** says:

Already? Tell!

**Jane** says:

No…I'll wait until you come home. It's tension of surprise

**Holidays!** says:

Noooo! Stop the Drama talk!

**Jane** says:

Hey, I don't complain when you start spouting Shakespeare.

**Holidays!** says:

I'll have you know that I haven't for ages.

**Jane** says:

Hm…

**Holidays!** says:

Don't look at me like that! guilty look

**Jane** says:

Lol…look, Lidy wants to use the computer. See you tomorrow, ok?

**Holidays!** says:

Whatever. Bye.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** Do not own any Jane Austenian works.

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse**

Em!

Has George asked you out yet? Okay, okay… I know you're "just friends" but… meh. I've been home for 3 hours, 56 minutes, 24 seconds, and I'm sick of Mum's gushing and Lidy and Cath's romanticising already. I'll tell you all the news, ok?

Newsflash 1:

Jane got dumped by Liam. Evil scheming twit. I hate him forever! I ask you Em, as class matchmaker. How can someone so _good _as Jane not find her perfect guy? Go ponder that instead of setting poor Harriet up with (shudder) _Elton._ They are so not going to happen okay? Besides, that poor guy's got it for you. Bad.

Newsflash 2:

You know that luxury apartment around the corner? It's been rented. By three (possibly) snobby people. I mean, who else would be able to afford that, but snobby people? Don't give me that look, Emma Woodhouse.

Anyway, I think Jane likes one of the guys there. I haven't met them yet, but.

Newsflash 4 (which isn't really a newsflash, but I will include as a newsflash to make up for lack of news.):

Lidy went shopping and bought two tops, three skirts, one dress, five pairs of shorts and one pair of jeans.

See how I am reduced to counting Lidy's shopping items, Em? Take pity on me. Visit sometime. Before I am driven to the oh-so-desperate measure of doing my assignments to retain some form of sense.

Liz

**Email from Jane Bennet to Fanny Price.**

Hello Fan!

How are you? Are you back at Mansfield yet? How's Ed?

Well, I hope you are all well, and that you are enjoying your holidays.

I don't know if I have told you, but my sister Elizabeth is back here for the holidays. She goes to uni somewhere else. Not here. It's great having her around, it means that I have someone to talk to. Not that Lidy, Cath and Mary aren't lovely, but…it's nice to have someone…closer to my own age. You get that, don't you, Fan? Good.

Don't worry; I'm completely over Liam. Not that I won't always think of him as one of my best friends, but. I've met someone else.

You know that apartment around the corner? It's been rented out. Two guys and a girl: Charles, William and Caroline. Charles and Caroline are siblings, and William is Charles' friend from high school. Charles is really cute and handsome, and he's so friendly! I like him so much already. Caroline is always really sweet to me. I like her too. William is nice.

So that's all the news I have. 

Take care,

Jane


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Me? Jane Austen? Never!**

**Thanks to forgotten-kiss for reviewing. I really (x 100000 etc.) appreciate it.**

**Transcript of conversation between William Darcy, Charles Bingley, Elizabeth Bennet, Jane Bennet, and Caroline Bingley:**

**Charles**: Hi Jane!

**Jane:** (blushing) Hi Charles. Oh, this is my sister Liz. She doesn't live with us anymore. She's back for the holidays.

**Charles:** Oh hello! I'm Charles. This is my sister Carols and my friend, Will.

**Elizabeth**: Hey.

**Caroline:** Yes…

**William**: (complete and utter silence)

**Charles:** (embarrassed by lack of enthusiasm) So. We just moved in down the road.

**Elizabeth:** I figured. (turns away) Oh Jane, look, there's Charlotte! (moves away, and calls over shoulder) Talk to you later, Charles, nice to meet you.

**Jane:** See you later. (leaves)

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**MSN convo between Emma Woodhouse, Elizabeth Bennet, and George Knightley:**

**Lizzy has been added to the conversation**.

**Emi **says:

Hey Liz!

**George** says:

Oh, hello, Lizzy.

**Lizzy **says:

Hey guys. Guess what?

**George** says:

**Lizzy** says:

I met this guy who was really up himself.

**Emi** says:

And that's new?

**Lizzy** says:

The thing is, Jane likes his friend. Anyway, we were at this party right? I was talking to Jane, and this guy calls out to her. That was Charles. He was cute. He's so right for Jane.

**George** says:

But that's not the point. Now continue.

**Lizzy** says:

I'm getting there, I'm getting there. Anyway, Charles introduces me to his friend and his sister. Will and Carols. I say hi. They look at me as if I'm a piece of dirt that got on their perfectly polished shoe. How does that work?

**Emi **says:

I know you, Liz. That's not all, is it?

**Lizzy **says:

Nope. Anyway, I was getting a drink, and I happen to overhear this conversation. Will was talking to Charles, and he goes: "I know she's the sister of the girl you like, but honestly, she's not worth talking to." Then Charles goes: "Come on, Will, she's cute." Honestly, that guy is rising in my opinion every minute.

**Emi **says:

And Will says…

**Lizzy** says:

Oh yeah. He goes in that typically snobby voice of his: "Look, Charles. She's okay, I'd admit. But I wouldn't dance with her if you paid me."

**Emi** says:

No, he DIDN'T.

**Lizzy** says:

He did. Trust me. Pfft. Like I care anyway. Got to go. Bye!

**Lizzy has left this conversation**.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **You guys should know by now. I am NOT Jane Austen, therefore I do not OWN any of her works.

**To:**

**Saz: **Thank you! More readable? As in...more clarification beforehand? More introduction? Explain:D

**Leo-Ressa:** Yep, right here! Thanks! I love putting all the stories together and making them fit. It's just FUN.

**a:** Original? Thanks! I hate it when someone has the same idea before me.

**forgotten-kiss:** Thank you for reviewing every single time so far! I will keep writing!

**A/N:** School starts again on Monday...soif my updatesslow down a bit, I'msorry! I promiseI haven't forgottenabout it, andI will update as soon as is humanely possible:D

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**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse**:

Hey Em.

Look at this: (Go cut and paste!)

_Group Email from Charles Bingley:_

_Hey Everyone!_

_My name is Charles Bingley and I've just moved into the apartment down the road with Will and Carols, my friend and my sister. (Respectively)_

_Just to get to know you all, I've decided to have a house-warming party. Please come! R.S.V.P. not required. Hope to see you there!_

_Cheers,_

_Charles._

_P.S. Jane, you are coming…right?_

Great. Just what I always wanted. To spend the evening with a bunch of people who think they own the universe. To be in the vicinity of William Snob Darcy and Caroline Prig Bingley.

Ha.

Unfortunately, being the sweet innocent soul I am, I have already promised Jane that I will attend. Fun fun!

Charles is cool though.

At least Charl will be there. Small consolation…but still, it's SOMETHING.

Bah.

Anyway…Frank Churchill, ay? Hm…tell me more! Anyway, see you on MSN or something. Don't do anything I would do!

Liz

P.S. Although that does give you a wide range of activities possible!

------------------

**Email from Lydia Bennet to Julia Bertram:**

Hey!

Oh my gosh, you will NEVER guess what has happened! You know that rich dude I told you about? Charlie? He's having a PARTY! I NEED to get NEW clothes so BADLY. And Mum agrees too, but Dad, being the OLD-FASHIONED behind-the-times old HAG, he is, will not LET me. How UNFAIR is that? I'm SURE I'll wear him down EVENTUALLY, though.

DANNY is going to be there! And he promised to bring some of his MATES! Oh my gosh, Danny CLONES! I can't WAIT!

I'll TRY to write in time to tell you every tiny DETAIL of the party, but I can't PROMISE, ok? I have SO much to do!

Ooh, that guy Crawford sounds HOT. Have FUN! I wish I could BE there!

Luv ya!

Lidy.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Hey guys, I know I said I might not write again for a little while, but here I am anyway! (I'm trying to squeeze in some writing in a pathetic attempt to make up for (possibly) a break in the writing.) If that made sense.

forgotten-kiss: Thanks! Er…I'm still in high school. But I'll take that as a compliment. Lol.

**--------**

**MSN convo between Emma Woodhouse and Elizabeth Bennet:**

**Em **says:

How was the party?

**Liz** says:

Darcy asked me to dance.

**Em **says:

Are you kidding? How much did Charles pay him?

**Liz **says:

Shut up.

**Em** says:

Okay, okay…

**Liz **says:

I couldn't think of an excuse, so I had to dance with him. Ten minutes 23 seconds of utter torture. Not that I was timing…

**Em **says:

Long song.

**Liz** says:

Unfortunately.

**Em** says:

Haha. Anyway, I'm trying to get John Elton, my ex,to get together with Harriet. You know, my friend?

**Liz** says:

More like your fan.

**Em** says:

Shut up.

**Liz** says:

Oh so witty.

**Em** says:

At least I'm getting SOMETHING done, which is more than I can say for you. Is ANYTHING happening between Jane and that Charles dude?

**Liz** says:

Stop using capitals. You're reminding me of Lidy.

**Em** says:

Tell.

**Liz** says:

No.

**Em **says:

Come on...I'll be "good"...

**Liz **says:

Lol. Well he invited her for dinner. So old-fashioned, I know…but he is nice. I was going to drive her, but Mum, being the oh-so-loving person she is, made her walk. And it's raining. Heavily.

**Em** says:

Poor Jane.

**Liz** says:

Mm…

**Em** says:

By the way George says hi.

**Liz** says:

Are you at your apartment?

**Em** says:

No, at George's

**Liz** says:

Ooh…

**Em** says:

It's nothing suss…I DON'T LIKE HIM THAT WAY.

**Liz** says:

Methinks the lady doth protest too much.

**Em **says:

Shut up. Besides, the whole gang is here...Harriet...John...Bella...Frank...

**Liz **says:

Everyone except me

**Em** says:

No, that's not true!

**Liz** says:

Sure…name five of the gang who aren't there.

**Em** says:

Er…Marianne…

**Liz** says:

She's back having holidays with the rest of the Dashwood clan. No one else, right?

**Em** says:

You?

**Liz** says:

Brb, the phone's ringing.

**Em **says:

Kk


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: **Short chapter...right here.

**Email from Jane Bennet to Elizabeth Bennet**:

Dear Lizzy,

Please don't freak out. Charles told me you freaked out when he called you to tell you I was sick. It's nothing life threatening. Really.

I'm fine.

It's just a passing cold…or something. DON'T BE SCARED. I'm FINE. Really. Charles just insisted I stay and see their doctor…because…

Don't be scared. I wouldn't even tell you this, apart from the fact that I hate lying to you.

Well. I fainted during dinner.

IT'S OKAY. I'm fine. I'll be home tomorrow. In time for breakfast. Or maybe lunch. Okay, dinner.

Well, whatever.

The point is, I'm fine. I'm perfectly okay. Don't panic, tell Mum that I'm fine –

Oh. You're here already.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: NOT JANE AUSTEN!

A/N: I get let out for summer in December. I'm probably living in a different country for most of you. This chapter decided to die on me, and only upload half. So, sorry.

I LOVE MY REVIEWERS! (purely platonically, of course...)

**MSN convo between Elizabeth Bennet and Emma Woodhouse.**

**Liz** says:

Sorry I never came back online last night. It was Charles on the phone.

**Em** says:

What? Why? Did he elope with Jane?

**Liz** says:

Em! As if Jane would do that! No, it's worse. She's sick. Really sick.

**Em **says:

Really!

**Liz** says:

And you know what the worst thing is? She refuses to admit it.

**Em** says:

Lol. Sounds like Jane

**Liz** says:

Yeah. Anyway, I'm at Charles' apartment now. DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT! I couldn't leave Jane alone, with his witch of a sister.

**Em** says:

True… So how is she?

**Liz** says:

Getting better… You know what's great about this place? They have Broadband.

**Em** says:

LOL. But Jane's okay, right?

**Liz** says:

Yeah, she's lying on the bed here, sleeping. She's good.

**Em** says:

That's good. You were going to tell me something interesting…and scandalous. Tell!

**Liz** says:

Okay, but I may go at any minute. If Jane wakes up.

**Em** says:

Whatever. Tell!

**Liz** says:

Well, after I danced with Darcy, Lidy and Cath came in, towing Danny and two mates. Lidy goes to me "You're not doing anything, dance with George!" and she practically throws the poor guy at me. He was really nice though.

**Em** says:

What was his name again?

**Liz** says:

George. George Wickham. Like George Knightley. Only different. Funny thing, though. Darcy saw me dancing with him, and he looked like he was going to have a seizure. Crazy git. But George W. asked me out. Tomorrow.

**Em** says:

!You like him, don't you?

**Liz** says:

EM! I only met the guy last night.

**Em** says:

And your point is…?

**Liz** says:

Well he's like myGeorge Knightley to me. Except that I have no intention of pretending I don't like him.

**Em** says

Liz, you know that this is George's computer. And he saves all msn conversations.

**Liz may not reply because her status appears to be offline**


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: HOW MANY TIMES! NOT JANE AUSTEN

A/N: Please REVIEW. I need the encouragement:)

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Mrs. Bennet

Mum,

It's cool, Jane's fine. She's gotten out of bed and everything. She's just a little weak. She wants to come home soon. Is that cool?

Liz

------------------------------------

Email from Mrs Bennet to Elizabeth Bennet,

Elizabeth,

No, that certainly is not 'cool'. You will stay there. A couple of days. At least. So that darling Jane can get to know that wonderful Charles. I insist.

Mum.

P.S. You can come home. There's nothing for you there. That William fellow is certainly too proud to be worth much.

-----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Mr Bennet,

Dad!

I know you only use this email address for work and stuff, but this is URGENT. Before you ask, Jane is ok. But Mum is convinced she's not. And she's forcing us to stay over for a while longer. Please Dad, PLEASE convince Mum to let us come home. Darcy is way too much to cope with!

Love ya,

Lizzy

---------------------------------

Email from Mr. Bennet to Elizabeth Bennet,

Dear Lizzy,

That's good to know Jane is recovering. And no, I do not blame you for emailing me at this address. I understand that it was an emergency. I did try to plead your cause, however, Madam is determined for you to extend your stay. I am terribly sorry, but she is insistent. However, I will ensure that you may arrive in two days or so. I am sorry that William Darcy is horrendously frustrating to you. Perhaps you should try to throw a book at him?

Much love,

Dad

---------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Knightley

Em!

Mum is FORCING me to stay at Charles' even though Jane is fully recovered. I HATE her. But not as much as I hate Darcy.

Last night we had this full-blown discussion. (here read as argument) He is SO darn SMUG. But of course, Carols WOULD have backed him up, but she didn't understand a WORD of what was going on. What he sees in that woman is beyond me.

Ergh.

Liz

---------------------------------

Email from William Darcy to Georgiana Darcy

Dear Georgiana,

How are you? I hope the new tutor, Mrs what-ever-her-name-is, is treating you well. Home schooling can be a bore sometimes.

Tell me how you're going, alright?

William

---------------------------------

Email from William Darcy to Kernel Fitzwilliam

Ker,

How the police force? Am staying with Charles, he's met another girl. Yes, again. More serious this time. But am thinking girl is only marrying him for money. Will try to discourage it. More on that later.

Charles' crush #23 (or whatever) has sister. Sister so darn opinionated. But pretty. Quite. But smart. And protective of sister. And funny. And kind. But always annoying. Very annoying.

Will

P.S. Has nice eyes

---------------------------------

Email from Fanny Price to Jane Bennet

Hi Jane,

Sorry it took me so long to reply to your email. I was trying to talk Tom, Jules and Maria out of having this big party. It didn't work, of course. But hopefully I won't have to be involved. It's tonight.

Ed's got a new girlfriend. Her name is Mary. Mary Crawford. Ed says she likes me but I have this funny feeling about her. Like she's scary and unpredictable. But that's probably just me being jealous.

She's got a brother, Henry. Jules and Maria are practically fighting for his attention. Apparently he's "hot". Somehow I don't see that. But that's just me.

Charles sounds just about perfect. I wish that I could meet my perfect guy…

Take care,

Fan

---------------------------------

Email from Jane Bennet to Fanny Price

Hello Fan,

That's okay. Tell me how the party went. I'm sure you managed to keep yourself out of trouble. You were never really that type of person to get into trouble. I loved that about you.

Don't be silly. You've already met your perfect guy. Ed IS your perfect guy, whether you realise it or not. Whether he realises it or not. He will realise it. Because the two of you are great together. Really great.

Charles is like my perfect guy. He's funny and smart and witty, and you get the picture. We've been out a couple of times, but nothing much yet. We've had other people with us at the time.

I have to go.

God bless

Jane.

---------------------------------

Email from Jane Bennet to Fanny Price

Fan,

He asked me out by myself!

Love you

Jane


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: Must I really repeat myself? Do not own any Jane Austen.

A/N: Thank you to Emma and GeeAMouse for reviewing. I really appreciate it!

Emma: Yeah, I know… I was stuck for ideas on his name, and so I just went for Kernel. I was HIGH, ok:D lol. Thanks for reviewing. :D

GeeAMouse: You added it to your favourites? I'm touched:D Lol… intruding on other people's messages is FUN. (not that I would know… innocent look) Yeah, I liked the whole other characters thing, because it's just… so interesting. :D Thanks for reviewing.

Chapter 9

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Knightley

Well.

Charles asked her out. Jane, I mean. She's so happy… over the moon. They're so cute together. I haven't heard from you in a while. How's George K ?

Liz

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Email from Emma Knightley to Elizabeth Bennet

That's GREAT. :D:D:D:D Jane must be SO happy. George? Um… I don't know. Haven't seen him for a while. There's this guy Frank and we're going out. Sort of. He's awesome. :D

Emma

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Email from Charles Bingley to William Darcy

Will? Where are you?

--------

Email from William Darcy to Charles Bingley

Out somewhere where there's sanity

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Email from Charles Bingley to William Darcy

What ARE you on about?

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Email from William Darcy to Charles Bingley

This is wearying. I'll talk to you on MSN. Get on MSN.

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**MSN conversation between William Darcy **(People are so STUPID) **and Charles Bingley **(What's up)

People are so STUPID says: 

Can you tell Charles?

**What's up **say:

Er… would you believe me if I said yes?

**People are so STUPID **says:

No.

**What's up **says:

You got it in one! So. What IS up, Will?

**People are so STUPID **says:

You like Jane Bennet, don't you?

**What's up **says:

Well, we've only been going out for two weeks…

**People are so STUPID **says:

Just answer the question.

**What's up **says:

Yes. I like her a lot.

**People are so STUPID **says:

My point exactly.

**What's up **says:

Stop talking in riddles and talk to me, Will.

**People are so STUPID **says:

She doesn't like you Charles. She only likes your money. Look, I hate to agree with Carols, but I'll add her to the conversation so you can hear her out.

**What's up **say:

No! WILL!

**Did you see her HAIR **(Caroline Bingley) **has been added to the conversation**

**People are so STUPID **says:

Too late.

**Did you see her HAIR **says:

Hey Will!

**People are so STUPID **says:

Just tell Charles what you think of Jane Bennet.

**Did you see her HAIR **says:

Will, do you want to go to this party with me?

**People are so STUPID **says:

Just tell him.

**Did you see her HAIR **says:

About what? Oh, Jane! Well, Charles, I hate to break your heart, but she's not cool. Her mother… whoa… no way. I bet she's only after your money.

**People are so STUPID **says:

Exactly what I said.

**Did you see her HAIR **says:

Oh my gosh. We are, like, SO similar.

**People are so STUPID **says:

I'm leaving this place Monday. You're coming with me.

**Did you see her HAIR **says:

Oh, I'm coming!

**People are so STUPID **says:

If you must. Anyway, convinced yet, Charles?

**What's up **says:

But she's an angel.

**People are so STUPID **says:

Charles! Stop being an IDIOT. We'll talk more when I get home, ok?

**What's up **says:

I guess.

**Did you see her HAIR **says:

Will? Did you want to come to the party with me?

**People are so STUPID may not reply because he appears to be offline.**


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: JA. Not me.

A/N:

outside the square: thanks! Yep, they are the different stories, it just makes things so much more interesting, both to write and …read? I don't know if it makes it interesting to read, because that's your job, not mine. But it's fun. :D Okay, I'll try to mess things up a little. It's just so hard for me, because I adore Jane Austen. :D

BuffyShakespeareAusten: Yeah… slip up. Sorry. I will get around to changing eventually. When I feel like it. Right now I just want to write the next chapter. You did? Hm…any ideas for unconfusifying it? Don't shoot me. My word. Pfft. Your feministic views coming in. Ok. I'll remember in the future. :D

manic610: Thanks! Yes, I like the whole everyone knows everyone else thing. It's fun. :D Thank you for reviewing:D

Chapter (what number are we on now?) 10

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Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse

Oh my gosh.

I can't believe it.

Charles has left.

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Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Fanny Price

Hey Fanny,

I know this is weird, me emailing you, but Jane's really upset. Charles (has she mentioned him?) has just left the neighbourhood without even saying goodbye or leaving contact details or anything. And she's not talking, so I wondered if you could get through to her? Please try?

Thanks

Elizabeth.

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Email from Jane Bennet to Charles Bingley

Charles,

Where are you? Why did you just leave? Why am I even bothering to write this letter? I don't even know what to say. I'm not going to send this. Do you hate me? Why did you go? This is stupid.

I miss you

**Email was not sent.**

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Email from Caroline Bingley to Jane Bennet

Janey, dear,

I'm SO sorry that we had to leave so SOON, but Will has URGENT business and we all want to go. Besides, we REALLY want to see Georgiana (his sister) SO much. Especially Charles! He is REALLY looking forward to seeing her again. They used to go out, you know. But the whole DISTANCE factor kicked in. But I think they will get together again. I HOPE to DEATH they will. They make SUCH a cute couple.

Luv ya

Carols

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Letter from William Collins to Mr. Bennet

Dear Sir or Madam:

I am aware that my father and yourself have not gotten along very well. Nevertheless, I am coming to your house tomorrow, to make amends. Expect me at 2 o'clock promptly.

Yours sincerely,

William Colins.

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Email from Lydia Bennet to George Wickham

What's going on with you and my sister?

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Email from George Wickham to Lydia Bennet

Nothing. We're friends. F-R-I-E-N-D-S. Want that spelt backwards? S-D-N-E-I-R-F.

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Email from Lydia Bennet to George Wickham

Does my sister know that? Or haven't you managed to take time off from snogging Mary King to tell her that you guys are off? By the way, what is it you see in Mary King anyway. She's UGLY.

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Email from George Wickham to Lydia Bennet.

She's a perfectly nice girl. And what do you care anyway?

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Email from Lydia Bennet to George Wickham

You mean a perfectly rich girl. And I know I seem like an unfeeling brat, but she's my SISTER. And besides, by grilling you, I get all the latest gossip.

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Email from George Wickham to Lydia Bennet

And she thinks that she isn't an unfeeling brat. But whatever. I'll tell your sister. Today. Ok?

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Email from Lydia Bennet to George Wickham

Brilliant. Then I can spread the news by tonight.

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Phone conversation between George Wickham and Elizabeth Bennet:

George: Hey? Liz?

Elizabeth: Hey… George?

George: How did you guess?

Elizabeth: I know you too well. George…I heard you were going out with Mary King.

George: (relieved) Yes… I hope you don't mind. I thought we were just friends.

Elizabeth: That's all we were… weren't we?

George: Well, I heard on the neighbourhood grapevine…

Elizabeth: In other words, my sister, Liddy

George: …that you thought we were together.

Elizabeth: Since when are you supposed to listen to a word Liddy says?

George: True…

Elizabeth: I'm guessing she emailed you?

George: Bingo. A number of times.

Elizabeth: Pfft.

-Awkward silence-

Elizabeth: Well I hope you guys are happy.

George: And I hope you will be happy too.

Elizabeth: (touched) Thanks, George. I should go now.

(Dial tone)

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Email from Elizabeth Bennet to William Darcy

Emma.

We broke up.

How's Frank?

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Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet

Elizabeth? Is that you?

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Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse

Shivers. I sent an email that was meant to you to William-javelin-up-his-goodness-knows-where-Darcy.

By the way, George and I broke up.

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Email from Elizabeth Bennet to William Darcy

Sorry.

That was meant to go to my friend.

--------

Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet

That's alright. Are you ok? You said you broke up with someone.

--------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse

Argh! He's being nice. He's not MEANT to be nice!

--------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to William Darcy

I'm fine. George and I broke up. That's all.

--------

Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet

That's horrible. Are you okay?

--------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to William Darcy

I'm fine.

--------

Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet

Okay. If you're sure.

--------

Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet

Whoa. Major ranting going on here. Would you care to explain?

--------


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: Pfft. Not nearly talented enough to own JA works.

A/N:

GeeAMouse: Thanks! My sense of humour is sometimes a bit… er… out of the box (here read as wacked) so it's nice to know someone actually appreciates it. :)

Carlses: Hehe… I feel SPECIAL! Mwahahaha… lol, I'll love Darcy for forever and a day, thus the sometimes too soft treatment of him. :D Broadening horizons, ay… lol. Well, I do feel very accomplished that I've managed to get you to do something you don't usually do. (Brainwashing! wOOt). I love your ff btw. It's fantastic!

forgotten-kiss: You're BACK! I thought you had forgotten about me. schniffle Nah, that's cool. I know how that feels (the no internet thing)… shudder… Internet is ESSENTIAL! Lol. Yeah, I know… Kernel… :P :) Meh. Thanks heaps anyway. You're still the bestest. :D

BuffyShakespeareAusten: Yes you should! Because I love getting reviews! Thanks! I'll try, see how that works. And I'll give you a Caroline/Darcy one in this chapter. Just to make you feel special.

Chapter 11 (already!)

Email from William Darcy to Charles Bingley:

Okay, Charles, you get your way. We go back to that town. But only for a weekend!

--------

Email from Charles Bingley to William Darcy:

Fantastic! Thanks heaps, Will!

--------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

Remember how you said you liked Elizabeth Bennet? Well I heard that she's dating two guys at the same time now. One's her ex-boyfriend, who got dumped by Mary King. Apparently Mary's parents didn't approve of him. The other's her cousin. How do you like that?

--------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

How amazingly intriguing.

--------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

I know! She's such a social outcast!

--------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

If you say so.

--------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

We even think the same way about social structure! How awesome is that?

--------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

Er, Caroline… hate to break it to you, but when someone says "if you say so" it usually means they're not interested in what you're saying.

--------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

You are such a tease! Hey, do you want to go to my friend's party with me? It's a couple thing, and we could go together. Sounds cool, right?

--------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

I'm busy.

--------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

Oh, don't be a bore. It'll be fun!

--------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

Reasons not to go:

I'm busy.

It's a 'couple thing.' I really don't want to be surrounded by snogging couples.

I hate your friends.

I'm busy.

--------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

Come on! It'll be fun! And don't worry about feeling out of place. You've got me!

--------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

Which part of "I'm busy" didn't you understand?


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: These things get wearying once you get to Chapter gasp, shock horror 12. I DON'T OWN JANE AUSTEN.

A/N:

embracing: your wish is my command. Lol. Here you go. In this chapter SOMEWHERE, there is a Mr. Darcy description. Only thing. I described him Colin Firthish. I didn't like the new Pride and Prejudice. Do you like the BBC version? Here's the update, and thanks for reviewing!

BuffyShakespeareAusten: You're welcome. I delayed Caroline seeing Darcy and Lizzy together until the next chapter. Sorry. But she will. I promise. :D I think it'll be funny, too. :D

drugged-on-chocolate: So it was you, not BSA who told me this was too short! Hopefully you'll like the length of this one better? Updating in this amount of time:

GeeAMouse: Thanks! Yes, she's just so… mfft… Thanks for reviewing! Here's the next update!

Chapter 12

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

Hey,

George and I got back together again. He was really sweet about it. He's such a great guy. I wonder how long we'll be together for… sighs dreamily lol.

But there's someone else who thinks he's "courting me" (his words, not mine).

Drumroll…

MY COUSIN

Yes, you heard me right. My COUSIN. WILLIAM-I'M-SO-GOOD-AND-PROPER-COLLINS!

Who just happens to be my FIRST cousin.

EW!

----------------------------------

Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

trying desperately to get gross mental image out of mind

decides to change the subject

George and I aren't speaking anymore.

Em.

----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

WHAT?

Why aren't you guys speaking!

----------------------------------

Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:

I don't know… he said that I was taking him for granted.

By the way, I'm going out with Frank.

Em

P.S: There's this new girl, Jane Fairfax at uni. She'll probably be taking your classes.

----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

Oh….

By the way, Darcy/Bingley trio are back in town.

----------------------------------

Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:

REALLY! TELL!

----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

Okay, Charles has just left. He invited us to a party he's giving. Caroline stayed at home, but Darcy came with him.

That guy is SO up himself! I mean, sure he's cute and all, but who says he can stand there like a block of WOOD. Though I guess a block of wood wouldn't really have his dark chocolate hair, and all, and I'm pretty sure that it wouldn't be so SMUGLY handsome, but STILL. He's so PROUD. Ergh.

I wish he'd go away. He makes me feel as if I'm doing something wrong.

And I wish he didn't have such great eyes.

----------------------------------

Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:

You like him.

----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

I DON'T

----------------------------------

Email from William Collins to Elizabeth Bennet:

Loveliest cousin Elizabeth,

Shall we go to Mr. Bingley's party together? We make a glorious couple, do you not think?

Sincerely,

William Collins

----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

HELP! MY COUSIN JUST ASKED ME OUT!

Hang on a second while I reject him…

----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to William Collins:

William, this is not a couple thing. It's just a whole bunch of friends gathering. So I don't really want to go with anyone. Sorry.

----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

I rejected him. Hopefully he'll have the sense…

Oh darn. He's emailed me again.

----------------------------------

Email from William Collins to Elizabeth Bennet:

Dear Elizabeth,

I understand completely. Perhaps we can just walk in together? Just to make a grand entrance?

----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

Wow, he's persistent. Maybe if I just ignore him, he'll go away. Why is he emailing me when we're in the same house anyway?

----------------------------------

Email from William Collins to Elizabeth Bennet:

I shall take your silence as consent.

Love,

William Collins

----------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

Oh HELP. He's gone and decided that we ARE going together. HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP!


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: notnotnotnotnotnotnotnotnotnotnotnot JANE AUSTEN.

A/N:

BuffyShakespeareAusten: Hehehe… I had fun with Mr. Collins… okay, he'll be less old-fashioned from now on. But not a lot:D Updating soon!

forgotten-kiss: Yay! People like Mr. Collins! wOOt! Yes, he's a git. Thanks. I enjoy updating and receiving reviews (hinthint) so I try to update as fast as possible. Which is not always that fast.

embracing: Ah, okay. Have you heard about the ending in the American version:S I love Colin Firth's Mr. Darcy too! Yay!

Tigger101: I don't review. You do. I update. And I do have tests left. I did my English oral today. But PROCRASTINATION IS FUN! Nooooo! Mr. Collins is disgusting! wOOt! Experience… well… looks guilty nah… I wish…:D lol. You're feeling random… aren't you….

Chapter 13:

Text message from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:

I'm at the party. Stupid William Collins decided to escort me in. Ergh. George looked a little stunned. So did Darcy, come to think of it… but luckily George came and rescued me. Darcy turned and saw George. He was… fuming… practically. I wonder why. I'll tell you about the party on MSN, when I get home.

------------------------------

Text message from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:

Ooh, this sounds good…

------------------------------

MSN conversation between Emma Woodhouse and Elizabeth Bennet:

**How can people be so vicious? **says:

Hey

**How LONG does it take to get home… **says:

Liz! FINALLY. How LONG does it take for you to get home?

**How can people be so vicious? **says:

Sorry, Em.

**How LONG does it take to get home… **says:

Okay, now tell.

**How can people be so vicious? **says:

Well, I was dancing with George and Darcy was glaring at George like crazy, so… I HAD to ask, okay?

**How LONG does it take to get home… **says:

You always were very blunt.

**How can people be so vicious? **says:

You make that sound like a bad thing.

**How LONG does it take to get home… **says:

Nuff said, now TELL.

**How can people be so vicious? **says:

Yeah, well apparently, what happened was that Darcy and George were best friends in high school.

**How LONG does it take to get home… **says:

REALLY? Whoa…

**How can people be so vicious? **says:

I reckon… and anyway, Mr. Darcy, Darcy's dad liked George, and got him a job and everything, and he looked after George until he died. Darcy was jealous and all, and after his father died, he fired George. (Darcy's dad was boss of this big company, and Darcy inherited it.)

**How LONG does it take to get home… **says:

Wow. That's harsh.

**How can people be so vicious? **says:

I reckon. Now, I have to go. Bye.

**How LONG does it take to get home…** says:

No, wait. There's something you're not telling me…

**How can people be so vicious? **appears to be offline.

------------------------------

Email from Caroline Bingley to Louisa Hurst.

Lou,

Oh my gosh. You won't believe what happened. You know how Charles had a party? Yeah, well, Elizabeth Bennet was being really up herself, so I decided to burst her bubble by dancing with her boyfriend. Anyway, she left the room, because her cousin was trying to flirt with her. Pathetic, hey. Whatever.

After a while, I noticed Darcy had left the room, so I stopped flirting with George Wickham. (Elizabeth's boyfriend. He is pretty hot.) I went around to look for Darcy, and I found him outside standing on the street. With Elizabeth Bennet.

They were kissing.

And that is why I need you to fly over now. We need to come up with a plan.

Carols

------------------------------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

So what's going on with you and that Bennet girl? I saw you two last night. You looked quite cozy together. When are you planning to propose? I'm sure she'll be happy to get out of this hole. And her sisters will be visiting you at Pemberley. Marital bliss, I'm sure.

------------------------------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

For the love of mud, Caroline, last night was a mistake. I didn't mean anything by it, and I don't think she did either. So leave me alone.

------------------------------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

Oh, was she drunk?

------------------------------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

I don't think so… oh, whatever, she might as well have been. I was drunk, anyway.

------------------------------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

I thought you never drink?

------------------------------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

No, I never drink. But who cares?

------------------------------

Email from Caroline Bingley to William Darcy:

Okay, in that case, since you're not romantically attached, then you won't mind going to a party with me?

------------------------------

Email from William Darcy to Caroline Bingley:

Can't. We're leaving this place tomorrow, remember?

------------------------------

Email from Charlotte Lucas to Elizabeth Bennet:

Okay, WHAT is up? You left the room, and I was left with William Collins, who is quite nice, by the way, and I go look for you, and Caroline Bingley is watching you kiss DARCY?

Explain. Now.

------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Charlotte Lucas:

You think William Collins is NICE?

------------------------------

Email from Charlotte Lucas to Elizabeth Bennet:

Yes. Almost charming. Now stop changing the subject.

------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Charlotte Lucas:

Look, Char. I really don't know. I guess I must have been drunk. I have a BOYFRIEND for heavens sake.

------------------------------

Email from Charlotte Lucas to Elizabeth Bennet:

Rubbish. You never drink. And maybe George isn't your dream guy?

------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Charlotte Lucas:

Even if he isn't, I can't go out with DARCY. He's despicable. Didn't you hear George tell us about what Darcy did to him?

------------------------------

Email from Charlotte Lucas to Elizabeth Bennet:

Whatever. You like him, don't you.

------------------------------

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Charlotte Lucas:

NO.

------------------------------


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: Jane Austenian Works are not mine. That's why they're called JANE AUSTEN works.

A/N:

Just a filler chapter. I seem to be doing a lot of these lately. :S I'll write more next time… develop the plot a little bit…

BuffyShakespeareAusten: Thanks. That's okay.

embracing: Well basically it's an extra scene and what happens is that Lizzy and Darcy are out of the terraces (?) in their nightclothes and they're kissing. A lot.

Thanks! I like updating now that people are reviewing. And Techno is fun to write. :D

Bag of Amino Acids: Thankee! Nonono… Lizzy and Darcy don't get drunk. It's just their excuse. Because they don't know why they did what they did.

The movie was set in the olden times. Mine is in the modern times. See a slight difference? Mine is an adaptation of Pride and Prejudice. Theirs was actually supposed to be Pride and Prejudice. Kachink!

Should it be modern or Jane Austen style?

forgotten-kiss: Thanks! Yeah… I know… it's so FAST! Leave? Oh, right. They have to leave at SOME point in time… it may as well be now. MWAHAHA…

Tigger101: Um… okay?

Chapter 14

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Charlotte Lucas:

Okay, okay… I'll tell you.

I had to get out, to escape from my COUSIN. And I was outside… and Darcy came out. We talked for a bit… well… I was berating him about George… and he was standing there like a rock.

And well…. It's not my fault that he has such nice eyes.

Email form Charlotte Lucas to Elizabeth Bennet:

Elizabeth and Darcy sitting in a tree… K I S S I N G

Sorry. I was transported momentarily back to primary school.

Hm… so you don't like William Collins? At all?

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Charlotte Lucas:

No. You can have him.

Email from Charlotte Lucas to Elizabeth Bennet:

Awesome, score!

Email from Charles Bingley to Jane Bennet:

Jane –

We are going away. I don't we'll come back. Sorry.

Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet:

Sorry about last night, I wasn't thinking straight.

Email from Caroline Bingley to Elizabeth Bennet and Jane Bennet:

Goodbye, amigos.

Email from William Collins to Elizabeth Bennet:

Would you like to go out with me to the coffee club?

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to William Collins:

Sorry. I'm going out with George tonight. Charlotte will go with you.

Email from Elizabeth Bennet to George Wickham:

Hello stranger,

Where have you been for the past oh-so-long? I'm coming over. To escape Collins. Is that cool?

Email from George Wickham to Elizabeth Bennet:

Sure.


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: As per all the other chapters.

A/N: To all my reviewers:

**BuffyShakespeareAusten: **Hm… I'll do that if you really want me to. Formatting is such a pain though… moans procrastinatingly Oh well… :P

**The reviewer who didn't put a name in the blank-oh, it was embracing: **lol. Thanks. I just thought Lizzy would be the type who would go for the eyes… you know the whole "eyes are the windows to your soul" thing? Yeah… Thank you, by the way, for being my (our) only reviewer on Crown Jewels. Much appreciated… School is nearly finished! Just Friday… Friday… lol. :P Here's the actual chapter… I think. And you don't have to know what you're talking about all the time. It makes life so much more interesting if you don't.

**Tigger101: **I actually thought I did. I mean, I had lines and everything on Microsoft Word, how was **I **supposed to know that Mr. Doc Man would be tiresome and delete it? Lol. I'll make sure I do this time. Yeah. Very random. Oh well, I like random… can you tell? Hm… I'm not actually sure… lol. :P

**snow1685: **thank you! Lol, Meg Cabot is cool. Here's the next update!

Chapter 15. (wow, I can't believe I got this far!)

**Email from George Wickham to Elizabeth Bennet: **

Liza,

I'm really sorry about last night. I wasn't thinking straight. Did you get home okay after you stormed out into the pouring rain?

George.

**-----------------------**

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to George Wickham:**

It's okay. I guess we're not great together, hey. But that's okay. I went and sat on a park bench… and thought. You're a great person, and you deserve happiness, I just don't think I can give you happiness. There's someone out there who's your (clichéd) true love, and I don't think it's me. We'll always be good friends, though. I really like you… as a friend.

'Liza'

**-----------------------**

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse: **

Hey.

How's it going with Frank? Have you and George (Knightley) made up yet?

George W. and I broke up last night. For good this time. But I think he's an awesome person, really. We'll always be great friends.

Liz.

**-----------------------**

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet: **

WOW

OH. MY. GOSH. Frank has been **engaged **all this time. TO JANE FAIRFAX. You know, that girl who's going to be in your class? Yeah, that's the one. I have NO CLUE how I feel about it. George and I are on pretty good terms, but a bit tense. He's not here at the moment – went to visit his brother a while ago.

Ooh, so have you hooked up with that Darcy dude? He sounds hot. Lol.

Em.

**-----------------------**

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Hey.

Oh, our house is in an uproar. Darcy and Bingley plus sister left the town with no intention of coming back. Bingley sent Jane this really cold email and Jane has been in bed (possibly crying – but only speculation) all day. Darcy and Bingley's sister are probably going to be engaged by the time they decide to come back…

So are you okay?

Liz

**-----------------------**

**MSN conversation between Elizabeth Bennet and William Collins:**

**Willie** says

Heyhey, gorgeous.

**Life in a hole **says:

Darcy?

**Willie **says:

No, no. William Collins, your cousin. Who's Darcy? Should I be jealous?

**Life in a hole **says:

You met him. Your boss's nephew? And what's there to be jealous of?

**Willie **says:

Well, we **are **'going out'.

**Life in a hole **says:

WHAT!

**Willie **says:

You and me, Lizzy, dear. We match.

**Life in a hole **says:

WHAT ARE YOU **ON**. WILLIAM COLLINS?

**Willie **says:

Now, now, don't be coy. Which brings me to my next point.

**Life in a hole **says:

USUALLY I WOULD SAY I WANT SOME, BUT SERIOUSLY, I DON'T!

**Willie **says:

Will you marry me?

**Life in a hole **says:

IF IT MAKES PEOPLE HAVE DELUS – **_WHAT?_**

**Willie **says:

Oh, let me try that again. Do you want to have a long-term relationship with me, live with me, and walk down the aisle with me? (that was sufficiently modern, I think)

**Life in a hole **says:

NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO. WILLIAM, WE'RE FIRST COUSINS!

**Willie **says:

So? Royals have done it.

**Life in a hole **says:

Yes, and usually resulting in mad children. Besides, I hate to bruise your delicate ego, but I DON'T LIKE YOU THAT WAY!

**Willie **says:

I'll give you time to act coy. I'll ask you again later on tonight.

**Life in a hole **says:

HOW CAN YOU BE SO THICK? I. DON'T. LIKE. YOU. LIKE. THAT. IN FACT, I DON'T LIKE YOU AT ALL.

**Willie **says:

See you tonight, dearest.

**Willie appears to be offline.**

**-----------------------**

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

OH MY GOSH. WILLIAM **COLLINS** MY STUPID COUSIN HAS PROPOSED TO ME. ON **MSN.** AND THEN WHEN I REJECTED HIM (ON MSN) HE REFUSED TO BELIEVE ME, AND INSISTED ON PROPOSING AGAIN THAT NIGHT. IN FRONT OF MY SHELL-SHOCKED **FAMILY. **I REJECTED HIM, AND NOW HE'S GONE OFF IN A HUFF TO STAY AT CHARLOTTE'S. I LOVE THAT GIRL. MUM'S REALLY MAD, COZ SHE THINKS I SHOULD HAVE **ACCEPTED **HIM. MUM IS **CRAZY.**

**-----------------------**

**Email from Jane Bennet to Fanny Price:**

Hello.

Charles has gone. But that's okay. Maybe he never was what I thought he was. But that's okay. I'm fine with that.

You won't believe what I heard, though. William Collins, my cousin proposed to Lizzy in front of us. She looked so frustrated – he refused to believe her rejection… but eventually it got through to him… and he was so mad. He's gone to stay with the Lucas's now… but I feel sorry for him

Jane.

**-----------------------**

**Email from Lydia Bennet to George Wickham:**

Georgie –

You WON'T believe it! Collins – Lizzy's cousin – proposed to her. In front of ALL of US. It was the BEST dinner entertainment since… FOREVER. She rejected him – duh.

Hey, what's going on with you and my sister?

Liddy.

**-----------------------**


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: Own not; sue not

A/N: I don't like swearing, but in this circumstance I find it necessary for some of my characters to do so, or at least have symbols which indicate that they are doing so.

Another thing. I have decided to dedicate this chapter entirely to the reactions of some of the characters, so it doesn't really move heaps. I promise to update soon though. : )

Chapter 16

**Email from Charlotte Lucas to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Hello Lizzy.

We need to talk. Today at noon at that coffee place?

Char

------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Charlotte Lucas:**

Sure. What's up, Char? I'm sorry for dumping my _cousin_ to you last night… but seriously, I didn't have a choice.

--------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$& #$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

#$&$&$&&&($&($ !#$$&&$$&$&

---------------------------------------------------

**Email from Jane Bennet to Fanny Price:**

_--------------------------------------------------  
_

Email from Lydia Bennet to Julia Bertram: 

**_OH MY GD _**(A/N: At this point in time, I find it necessary to indicate that Lydia probably would have completed the expression. Unfortunately, I cannot.)**_ OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD OH MY GD_**

---------------------------------------------------

**Email from Mary Bennet to William Collins:**

Dear cousin,

May I offer my sincerest congratulations and best wishes for your felicity.

Cousin Mary

---------------------------------------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet: **

Okay, WHAT is UP with you?

---------------------------------------------------

**Email from Fanny Price to Jane Bennet:**

Jane,

Are you alright? I can deduce from your exclamation marks that you are either very surprised, very shocked, very horrified, very happy, or very dazed.

That list isn't very restricted. So perhaps you'd do me a favour and tell me what has happened?

Fan

----------------------------------------------------

**Email from Julia Bertram to Lydia Bennet:**

Ooh… gossip. Tell.

----------------------------------------------------

**Email from William Collins to Mary Bennet:**

Thank you.

-----------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

CHARLOTTE has gotten ENGAGED to COLLINS

------------------------------------------------------

Email from Jane Bennet to Fanny Price: 

Nothing really. My cousin, William Collins, who proposed to Lizzy the other day has gotten engaged to one of Lizzy's best friends.

I hope they will be very happy.

Jane

--------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Lydia Bennet to Julia Bertram:**

Shan't tell you. You're going to have to learn through the grapevine. That's for flirting with my ex. I hear things, Jules.

--------------------------------------------------------

**MSN conversation between Elizabeth Bennet (It's better to be lonely than unhappy) and Charlotte Lucas (I am very fond of you Collins!) **

**It's better to be lonely than unhappy **says:

Hey Char. I'm sorry about my reaction before. I was just… surprised.

**I am very fond of you Collins! **says:

That's alright. I was kinda expecting that type of reaction. You see…

**It's better to be lonely than unhappy **says:

Yes?

**I am very fond of you Collins! **says:

I'm not looking for love. I never have. I just want a home. Look at me Liz. I'm not pretty. I never have been. To even have a guy like Collins want to be with me for the rest of his life is a blessing. I just want to be needed. And Collins needs me.

**It's better to be lonely than unhappy **says:

He needs you, Char. But there's someone out there who wants you.

**I am very fond of you Collins! **says:

Is there?

**It's better to be lonely than unhappy **says:

Of COURSE there is!

**I am very fond of you Collins! **says:

But I can't wait for that person forever! What if he dies? What if he never makes it over here? What if he lives in a different country; a different planet?

**It's better to be lonely than unhappy** says:

Now you're just getting carried away.

**I am very fond of you Collins! **says:

Am I? I don't know Liz. I'll be fine. I doubt there really is someone there for me, anyway. Who would want me?

**I am very fond of you Collins! appears to be offline.**


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: I don't own P&P or any of JA's works

Chapter 17

Email from William Collins to Elizabeth Bennet, Maria Lucas and Dr. Lucas:

Dear friends,

To celebrate our nuptials, we should like to extend a warm invitation to you, Dr. Lucas, as the father of my lovely wife, you, Maria, as the charming sister of my lovely wife… and Elizabeth…because Charlotte wishes you to come… for a housewarming of the most splendid kind. There you will rub shoulders with the most delightful Mrs. Catherine De Bourgh, a rich widow with a delightful daughter. It is an opportunity of a lifetime, and we are offering it to you.

I expect to see you there.

With much delight.

William Collins.

------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Charlotte Collins to Elizabeth Bennet, Maria Lucas and Dr. Lucas:**

Hey guys,

In case you couldn't understand Collins' email, here's the deal. We're married. We move away. I miss you guys. You guys visit me. Okay? And Lizzy… please come.

Char

-------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Charlotte Collins:**

Char-

Are you sure you want me there?

Liz

--------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Charlotte Collins to Elizabeth Bennet:**

YES please.

--------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Charlotte Collins:**

Then I'll be there.

--------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Oh my gosh, what have I gotten myself into? I promised Char that I would go and visit her and stay at her place for two weeks! Just when I thought that I had gotten rid of Collins forever…

HELP, EMMA, HELP!

Liz

--------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Okay, it's confirmed. You're the stupidest person alive. That's what you wanted me to say, isn't it?

Alright, alright. Look, don't worry. I would have done the same in your place… well maybe not… I'm a bit more vicious… look there's nothing much you can do right? And from what I hear Catherine thingo's really rich… owns a waterpark… that should be fun right? Not that she goes near it… she just sits up in her luxury apartment telling people what to do…

So just go… Collins can't follow you everywhere… it's okay. REALLY.

Love – Em

P.S. I'm going out with George K. I hope that's okay with you.

---------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

YOU'RE GOING OUT WITH GEORGE KNIGHTLEY AND YOU WAITED UNTIL THE P.S. TO TELL ME? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? SO YOU FINALLY ADMIT THAT YOU GUYS ARE PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER?

-----------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:**

squeaks yes…

-----------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse: **

TOOK YOU A WHILE!

Honestly… you people… do I have to do everything for you?

-----------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Haha… whatever… Oh, and Harriet got back together with Rob. How's Darcy going?

----------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Oh, cool. Er… Darcy and Bingley left a while ago… leaving poor heartbroken Jane in his wake… I'm not sure where Darcy is now… Em, you're not trying to set me up with _Darcy _are you? I thought you'd have learnt your lesson with Harriet. How many times did you break her heart? I have to go now… Dr. Lucas and Maria are waiting for me… Off to pure torture I go… If you never hear from me again I'm dead, okay? Good.

Liz

P.S.: Enclosed is my last will and testament.

-------------------------------------------------------------

**Elizabeth Bennet's Last Will and Testament:**

Complete Works of ShakespeareDad (Mr. Bennet)

Mobile Emma Woodhouse

ComputerEmma Woodhouse

LaptopJane Bennet

Cookbook for DummiesMum (Mrs. Bennet)

Clothes Kitty and Lydia Bennet

And Jane gets the first choice of anything else. Okay?

-------------------------------------------------------------

**MSN conversation between Elizabeth Bennet (Wow…rich people) and Emma Woodhouse (I LOVE GEORGE):**

**Wow…rich people** says:

I'm not dead yet.

**I LOVE GEORGE **says:

Obviously. Does that mean I don't get your mobile and computer yet?

**Wow…rich people** says:

No.

**I LOVE GEORGE **says:

Darn.

**Wow…rich people** says:

Love already?

**I LOVE GEORGE **says:

Huh?

**Wow…rich people** says:

Your msn name.

**I LOVE GEORGE **says:

Oh… right… er… how's it going up there?

**Wow…rich people** says:

Changing the subject… oh well… Catherine De Bourgh is really really really really rich. And her waterpark? It's massive. "People flock around from all over to gather here." – quote, Collins.

**I LOVE GEORGE **says:

Cool… I wish I were there.

**Wow…rich people** says:

No you don't. Even that's not worth listening to CDB ask me my age, my sisters' ages, my parents' ages, what jobs they have, where we go to school, how 'ill-accomplished' (and I quote), we are. It's OJFOJA ODGJAOJTORUAMGDFMG:O$ )#$)($TITDLGKLG.

**I LOVE GEORGE **says:

OJFOJA ODGJAOJTORUAMGDFMG:O$ )#$)($TITDLGKLG. ?

**Wow…rich people** says:

Mmhm. Very much so.

**I LOVE GEORGE **says:

Well, I've got to go. George has shown up.

**Wow…rich people** says:

Ooh… lol. Well, I have to go as well. Collins has just walked in saying that he has a _surprise_ for me. Knowing him, it's going to be something like an arranged marriage to his cousin or something. It would be too creative of him to decide to have two wives. Lucky me!

**I LOVE GEORGE **says:

Lol. Bye.

**Wow…rich people** says:

Bye.

**Wow…rich people appears to be offline**

**A/N: How about if I promise you guys virtual sundaes if you review? Huh? How's that:D :D**


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: Don't own this, never will. Get that straight, please.

Chapter 18

MSN conversation between Elizabeth Bennet (What is HE doing here?) and Emma Woodhouse (I LOVE George):

**What is HE doing here? **says:

Oh. My. Gosh.

**I LOVE George** says:

What?

**What is HE doing here? **says:

Oh. My. Gosh.

**I LOVE George** says:

You've said that already…

**What is HE doing here? **says:

What is HE doing here?

**I LOVE George** says:

As reflected in your msn name…

**What is HE doing here? **says:

Darcy, Emma, DARCY!

**I LOVE George** says:

Wait. Stop. Rewind. WHAT?

**What is HE doing here? **says:

Yes! WILLIAM DARCY IS THE NEPHEW OF RICH WATERPARK OWNER CATHERINE DE BOURGE AND HAS COME TO VISIT HER

**I LOVE George** says:

You spelt 'De Bourgh' wrong.

**What is HE doing here? **says:

Who gives?

**I LOVE George** says:

ME.

**What is HE doing here? **says:

Whatever. I better go… Collins is bugging me… I'll email/text you.

**I LOVE George **says:

kk. Bye.

**What is HE doing here? appears to be offline.**

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Ohhhh… Darcy's SO infuriating. I was forced to spend the day with his cousin and him. His cousin's name is Kernel. I know, funny name… but not as funny as the guy himself. He's REALLY nice and funny.

Anyway, CDB's lactose intolerant, fair (almost to the point of pasty) skinned, hypochondriac of a daughter, Anne, decided to toddle out to go to the water park with me, Darcy and Ker. I abandoned Darcy with her and hung out with Ker. They were never far away though. I mean, I could still hear her going.

"But _William,_ the sun is _burning_ my _skin._"

And him replying:

"Put more layers of clothing on then."

Honestly, if she had more layers of clothing on, you could drop her from the top of the Eiffel Tower and she'd _bounce._ Ergh…

Want to hear more of Anne dearest?

"But _William,_ the water is so _wet._"

I ask you! Her mother owns a _water park _and she complains about the water being wet? And newsflash, Annie:

WATER.

IS.

MEANT.

TO.

BE.

WET.

I know, shocking isn't it? I could hardly believe it when I first heard. I hope I didn't shatter your little ailment filled world there.

Gr…

Sorry for the long rant, Emma, but I'm DYING here.

At this rate you'll get my computer and mobile very soon.

Liz

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Kernel Fitzwilliam to William Darcy:**

So.

So, so, so, so, my little grasshopper.

So I finally get to meet Elizabeth Bennet. _The _Elizabeth Bennet. The one you've been moaning about for the entire trip here. The one that you're madly in love with.

My, my… the little grasshopper is finally growing up!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from William Darcy to Kernel Fitzwilliam:**

Okay, Ker. Let me get this straight.

You think I am 'madly in love' (and I quote) with _Elizabeth Bennet. _If you had said I loved thingo… Anne, I could not have been more surprised.

Grow up, Ker.

Will

P.S. Do _not _refer to me as 'my little grasshopper' in public, please. It's bad enough that you do it to me.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from William Darcy to Georgiana Darcy:**

Georgiana –

Am currently at your aunt's water park. Ker is annoying – as usual. Hope you're having a good time at home.

William

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Kernel Fitzwilliam to Georgiana Darcy:**

Hey Ana,

Just thought I'd drop you an email, just to see how you're going. We're all peachy here – Anne's whining is driving Will insane, though – you know how Aunt Catherine always wanted Will to marry Anne. I guess you'll just have to put up with an insane brother. I always wanted to see what Will was like insane…

All that aside, I just thought you might like to know that Will _likes _someone. He denies it, of course, but pfft. I _know _things… mwahahahaha… lol.

Got to run. Catch you later.

Ker.

**A/N: VIRTUAL SUNDAES! WOOHOO!**

**To my wonderful, amazing, and other similar words, reviewers, I present you with… A VIRTUAL SUNDAE! HEHEHEHEHE!**

**So… to… snow1685… Redhood79… embracing…animaeanne… BuffyShakespeareAusten… Isthia (haha… congratulations on delurking! Delurk again I'll give you… virtual brownies!)… notfallinginlove**

**YAY! So like I told Isthia, virtual brownies (and ice cream?) if you review this chapter! I better go do my science shudder . See you later!**

**Slam a revolving door**


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: If I were Jane Austen I would be long dead. So obviously I do not own any of this.**

**A/N: To those who asked, (sorry, I can't do review replies today – I promise I will for this chapter) Ana is nickname for GeorgiANA. Sorry for confusing you. :( I'll just use it once more, and then I won't use it again. :)**

**Chapter 19**

**Email from Georgiana Darcy to William Darcy:**

Dear William,

I am fine and having as good a time as can be hoped. Caroline and Louisa come around constantly and they amuse me greatly. However, they are leaving for their brother's apartment soon. I will be with my governess, so I will be fine. I hope you enjoy your trip. Send Aunt my best wishes.

Love,  
Georgiana

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Georgiana Darcy to Kernel Fitzwilliam:**

Hi Ker,

Anne is a nice girl, once you get to know her. She could be something you know. Perhaps you should try being nice to her:) Although she always did have a crush on William… and Aunt always wanted her to marry him… Never mind… I'm sure you'll have a good time at the park anyway – it's so hot! William never told me he likes someone… are you sure you're not making something out of, well, nothing? I'm sorry, I have to go, my governess is calling me.

Bye! Talk soon!

Ana

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Jane Bennet to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Hi Lizzy,

How are you? How is Charlotte? How is William? Are you enjoying life at the water park? From your phone call, it sounds like your survival is threatened by the presence of a certain Mr. Darcy. Lizzy, don't be like that – he's not that bad! I'm sure it's not his fault that Charles and I broke up – how can it be? Enjoy your time at the water park – it's rather hot over here – poor Mum desperately wants air-conditioning, but Dad refuses to install it. I have to email Fanny, she sounds rather in need of counselling, but I'll talk to you later, all right?

Love you and God bless,

Jane

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Jane Bennet to Fanny Price:**

Fan –

Ed and Mary are still together? Really? I thought – well never mind. :) If Henry wants to go out with you, then go out with him. Maybe, who knows, maybe you'll like him better than Ed? I mean, give him a chance… the poor guy's been after you for ages… and… well, I don't know.

I really shouldn't be giving you advice about guys – look how my summer romance turned out! But it's okay, I'll be fine. Give Anne a call maybe?

Love, and God bless,

Jane

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Em! I HATE HIM! I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HIM!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:**

I'm guessing you're either referring to Collins, Darcy or CDB. Most likely Darcy. Least likely CDB. I'm not a mind-reader. Tell!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Darcy. Do. You. Know. What. He. Did?

Kernel told me that he influenced Charles to break up with Jane. He told Charles that Jane was only after him for his money. Of course, Kernel didn't know the girl in question was Jane, or my sister.

He said (and these words will stay with me forever):

"Apparently Charles was involved with some girl who only wanted him for his money. So good ol'Darce broke them up."

NOW do you see why I hate him?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Ouch. That burns! Are you, er, going to tell your sister?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

No, how can I? She's trying to kid herself that he didn't mean a thing, and she's so much better. How can I burst her bubble by bringing the past in again?

No, Em. That guy is as good as dead to me. I only wish his friend could be as well. But it's a bit hard to think a guy is dead when he's sitting next to you.

Very difficult.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Uh…Elizabeth…

You know, I'm kind of bored, so maybe we could go down to –

_Email was not sent_

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
_

**Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Hey Lizzy,

I was thinking if you weren't doing anything, and it would be okay if you were because I know that you're busy and there's quite a lot to do and my aunt is –

_Email was not sent  
_

_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
_

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to William Darcy:**

How could you do that to Jane? Jane liked Charles, for goodness sake! Perhaps you should get that javelin out of your –

_Email was not sent  
_

_----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
_

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to William Darcy:**

I hate you, you git.

_Email was not sent._

_-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
_

**Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Look, I know that your family isn't rich, and I know that you have to have a scholarship to go university. I know that your mother is a real idiot, and some of your sisters are ditzes. Your father has no respect for your mother, and your family life is really stuffed up. But with all that in mind, I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me with the intention of becoming my girlfriend? I didn't think you had a boyfriend yet – as if. But yeah, I, like Charles, am rich… so think about it?

William

----------------------------

**A/N: Virtual brownies and ice cream go to animeanne, embracing, notfallinginlove, Isthia (yay, you delurked again! wild applause my friend, wild applause ), BuffyShakespeareAusten and Redhood79.**

**huggles you guys rock!**

**Hm, how about strawberry cheesecake? I'm not sure… losing inspiration… ergh… no wait, I know! How about a gingerbread house each? I have to go make mine for Christmas… ergh…**


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer: I do not own Jane Austenian works. **

**Chapter 20**

**Email from Kernel Fitzwilliam to William Darcy:**

Whoa, Will, are you okay? That girl has a better right-hook than me! Not that that's saying much…

-----------------

**Email from William Darcy to Kernel Fitzwilliam: **

Apart from my bruised pride, I am, indeed, fine. Do you mind if we cut our visit short?

------------------

**Email from Kernel Fitzwilliam to William Darcy: **

No problem. I'm guessing she said quite a lot before she hit you? I mean, I only came into the room after I heard raised voices… so… oh, never mind.

Loosen up, little grasshopper. You'll be going to Carols soon.

------------------

**Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Elizabeth –

Firstly, I am not going to ask you what I asked you before. Secondly, look, I know I made Charles break up with Jane. But I thought, and I did really believe this, that Jane didn't like him in that way, and it was just another scheme of your mother's, playing on Jane's beauty (I admit she is beautiful), to get a rich husband. Who knows? Maybe she would divorce him afterwards and get all his money; I don't know your sister.

With the thing about George Wickham… whatever he told you… whatever you believe… is false. Basically… well, as you know, or maybe you don't… whatever. His dad worked for my father, and he was very good. When Mr. Wickham got sick, my father paid for his hospital bill and everything. When Mr. Wickham was on his deathbed, my father promised that he would look after… George.

Soon after, Father died, and I became boss of the company. George came to me one day and asked for a transfer to another branch of the company, because he didn't like working here, or some random reason like that. So I transferred him out.

I thought I'd heard the last of him.

But no. My sister, Georgiana fell in love with him… or so she thought. It so happened, that he was working around the area where she was living, with a governess – Mrs. Young. George seduced my sister and when he finished with this branch, he asked her to go with him and live in a de-facto relationship.

My infatuated sister agreed.

I visited them a day before George was to move away. Georgiana couldn't bring herself to leave me behind and so she told me her plan. I took the only action I could. I fired him from the entire company.

So you see; this is why George Wickham hates me, and why I hate him. About your sister; if she really did love Charles, then I am sorry.

William

----------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

I hate people who wreck my sister's relationships and use semi-colons.

---------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Oh? And you're not referring to anyone in particular?

--------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Not particularly, no.

--------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:**

I don't for one moment believe you, but I'll let it slide for now. By the way, how IS Jane?

--------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Good… well, better. My aunt, Mrs. Gardiner, invited her to stay with them. Jane loves the little nieces and nephews – I called her, and she sounds so much better. )

Darcy left this morning with Kernel. I'm glad. Hopefully I'll be going soon as well.

Hopefully.

So how's George? And everyone else? I'm bored stiff here. You'd think that having a _water park_ would liven things up slightly. But no. Ergh.

Must. Get. Out. Of. Here. NOW.

--------------------

**Email from William Collins to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Dearest Elizabeth,

I do hope that you enjoyed your stay. As you can see, Charlotte and I are in perfect marital bliss at the moment, and perhaps one day you will regret –

Perhaps I should stop there.

We only wish that you would one day, be as happy as we are. I doubt you will have the same luxuries as we do, but nevertheless, you will be happy with your lot in life.

Sincerely,

William Collins

--------------------

**Email from Charlotte Collins to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Well… there you have it, Lizzy. My life-story I'll grow old and die, and that will be my life. Don't feel sorry for me, I'm fine. I really don't mind it this way… really.

I wish you all the happiness in the world.

Love always,

Char

---------------------

**To Redhood79, embracing, BuffyShakespeareAusten, Isthia, anon, animeanne, guesshu, notfallinginlove, Happily Depressed and ionalama, I present you with a gingerbread house or strawberry cheesecake. Woohoo! **

**Chocolate next time. **

**Love, as always**

**SARD**


	21. Chapter 21

**D: I do not own anything. **

**Chapter 21**

**Email from Anne Gardiner to Elizabeth Bennet: **

Hello Lizzy,

I know that you've just gotten back from a visit to your friend's, but your uncle and I were wondering if you want to come on a holiday with us?

Love,

Anne

-------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Anne Gardiner:**

YES YES YES YES YES! Thank you _so _much, Aunt!

Love,

Lizzy

------------

**Email from George Wickham to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Hey Liza,

How are you? I haven't seen you around for a while, though Lydia told me that you were at Mrs. De Bourgh's waterpark. I don't envy you: Mrs DB is _very_ much like her nephew – you _do _know that Will Darcy is her nephew, right? Well, yeah.

Want to go to Starbucks with me afterwards?

-------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to George Wickham:**

No, I do not want to go to Starbucks with you. What about your girlfriend… Mary King? You really can't expect me go out with you if you're cheating on her.

Yes, I met Darcy. Yes, I knew he was Mrs. DB's nephew. )

I'm going on a holiday with my aunt and uncle. So I'll meet up with a couple of friends later to say goodbye.

I'll call you.

Liz NOT Liza

--------------

**Email from George Wickham to Elizabeth Bennet:**

For heavens sake, relax, girl. I was just asking you out as a friend, though if you want to be anything more… wink I've broken up with Mary King.

Oh, you met Darcy? What did you think of him? Snotty as ever?

I'm leaving this area for the bigger city soon, so yeah, I'll keep in contact though!

George

---------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to George Wickham:**

Oh… Well, I'm really not interested in a relationship at the moment.

------------

**Email from George Wickham to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Relax, girl, RELAX! Why is it that everything I say/type today rubs you up the wrong way?

Well, how was Darcy?

------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to George Wickham:**

Sorry… it's just so… weird to be back. I'm still adjusting I guess. Darcy was good. He's not as bad as you think. We got talking. I guess I think he's…interesting. Not nice, but… nice?

------------

**Email from George Wickham to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Oh, really? That's interesting. Look, I don't think I'd be able to come to the get together. I probably need to pack.

-------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to George Wickham:**

Whatever. Have fun at wherever you're going.

-------------

**Email from Jackie Foster to Lydia Bennet:**

Hey Liddy,

D'you want 2 go 2 this city with me? It's the one where that hottie, Wickham is going. And you've got a thing for him.

-------------

**Email from Lydia Bennet to Jackie Foster:**

Ooh, YES. What should I bring? What clothes? How much $$$?

---------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Hey. Sorry I haven't emailed you in a while. I've been busy and I guess you've been busy too? wink, wink, nudge, nudge lol. I'm back at home now, and everything's much the same, except that Liddy's been making a fuss, wanting to go to Brighton – where George Wickham is going. I told Dad that that's not a good idea, but he refused to listen to me – he really wants to avoid conflict with Mum and Liddy. Kitty's been throwing a huge tantrum – not that anyone listened – because she wants to go too, and Liddy's friend didn't invite her. Aunt and Uncle are going to take me somewhere… far far away… for a long time? I hope. Anything to get out of this madhouse, really.

Lizzy

-------------

**Email from Fanny Price to Jane Bennet:**

Jane, the most terrible thing has happened! You know Henry? He ran off with Julia! Julia who is engaged – _engaged_! And with Henry Crawford of all people! The entire family is in an uproar; I really don't what to do!

Help!

Fan

-------------

**Email from Jane Bennet to Fanny Price:**

Fan,

Breathe in… breathe out... good. Look, Julia is a sensible girl, she'll realise her mistake. Really, don't worry about it. And besides, Henry Crawford sounds like a… nice man. He'll look after her. It would probably have been better if she had told… oh, never mind. The point is, it's better that she's happy, right? And… well… yes. She's happy. That's… good, right?

Jane

--------------

**Email from Julia Crawford to Lydia Bennet:**

Oh my gosh, Liddy, guess _what?_ I'm MARRIED! MARRIED, LIDDY, MARRIED! AND NOT TO MY BORING OLD FIANCÉ EITHER! TO HENRY CRAWFORD! WHEE!

--------------

**Email from Lydia Bennet to Julia Crawford:**

That is COOL! Henry is, like, HOT! But I've got better news! I'm chasing this guy across the country! George Wickham – he's been pretty hard to get – he liked my SISTER at first, but she doesn't like him anymore or something. Some random reason that she's not going to tell me. But whatever. Watch this space, I'll get him.

---------------

**A/N: chocolate goes to: BuffyShakespeareAusten, snow1685, not falling in love, Isthia, embracing, icefirestar, ElvenTresses and Katkit. **

**THANK YOU GUYS! (hugs all around) **

**Wildberry and buttermilk icecream and jelly for people who review this chapter. I've just been having it. It's very very nice. And it's low fat!**


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

Hey Em,

How are you? I'm really sorry that I haven't written/called/texted in a while, I've been really busy and haven't been able to get near a computer.But then again, I'm also wondering if I should be apologising - you've probably been busy yourself - winkwinknudgenudge. Lol.

As you know, my aunt and uncle have decided to take me on a trip around Australia and it's been really fun. So far, we've been to Monkey Mia in Perth and the Seven Apostles and so many more quintessially Australian landmarks that I have never seen in my life before. Which is kind of sad, when you think about it - after all, I've been living in Australia for... well, as long as I've been alive, really. P But whatever, at least now I get to see them right?

Now we're in a hotel in Sydney and they have an internet cafe downstairs in the lobbyish area. It's really quite posh and all - they've even got a chandelier and the doorman goes around saying things like "Thank you ma'am" or "Have a nice day, miss." I don't think I've ever been called ma'am or miss in my life.

Right now I'm listening to music on my iPod and writing to you. I'm listening to _If I Could Be Where You Are_ by Enya, and I guess I'm humming it louder than I'd thought, because people around me are giving me funny looks. Maybe I should stop now. Yeah, this guy on my left - an old man in a business suit - just said "Shush!" really loudly. You know, he's probably making more noise than me with that 'shush'. But maybe I should stop now.

So yeah, besides the old dude, there's a youngish lady with a really stressed look on her face and a teenager who looks like she's just stepped in accidentally. There's also another teenagerish girl - probably about 19 - who's ignoring the rest and by the small smile on her face probably writing an email to someone, possibly her boyfriend, or perhaps even on MSN, or something.

Oh my gosh, guess what?

She's humming _The Point of No Return_ from Phantom of the Opera. I love that movie! Hang on a second, I'm just going to lean over to her and say hello and introduce myself... she'll probably think I'm weird/strange, but hey...

Okay, that was weird: she doesn't think I'm strange. And she's a huge fan of the Phantom of the Opera and Enya. How cool! She introduced herself as Ana and apparently her family owns this place... and apparently she's waiting for her brother... oh there he is... hang on a second...

Right. This is really quite strange/weird/nice. Ana's gone now, she's going out with her brother for lunch or something. Guess who her brother is? No? I'll give you a couple of hints... He's... oh forget it. I'll just tell you.

It was Darcy. WILLIAM DARCY.

And Ana is short for GeorgiANA. She's his sister! The one who was seduced by George Wickham! Argh! She's so nice though! Poor child. And you know what was stranger? Will was NICE. He was nice and polite and he invited me out to lunch with them but of course, I declined - what with being in shock and all. Not that I wouldn't have declined anyway.

Anyway, Aunt and Uncle are here. I'll email you later.

Love of the platonic variety,

Lizzy

* * *

**Email from Georgiana Darcy to Kernel Fitzwilliam:**

Hi Ker,

How are you? I'm sorry you can't join us in Sydney at the moment, because we met a friend of yours today. Do you remember Elizabeth Bennet? Well, she's staying at the hotel and I met her at the Internet cafe when she leaned over to ask me about Phantom of the Opera. Now this is really quite strange, because I love Phantom of the Opera. She's really nice and we had a nice long discussion about Erik versus Raoul. But because both of us were for Erik, it wasn't really much of a discussion.

Anyway, we were having a substantial amount of fun when Will turned up. It would have been quite funny, really, if it hadn't been so romantic. Lizzy looked up as he entered and their gaze met. Both were arrested at the sight of each other and couldn't move for a few moments. It was as if no one else existed in the world.

Okay, maybe I'm romaticising it a tiny bit too much, but what can I say, Ker? I'm a writer! I prefer to live life in books! You should know me by now. But anyway, back to Will and Lizzy. Will came over and spoke to her - nothing much, just 'How are your sisters?' But apparently, that was the wrong question - I could tell by the slight tightening of Lizzy's lips. But she answered calmly enough and Will was nice and polite and asked her to join us for lunch. She declined and he nodded politely. But I could tell throughout lunch that there was a faint, forgotten smile on his lips and a slight upbeat in his step.

Maybe I watch people a little too much. I'm a flaneur!

Anyway, I should go.

Bye for now!

Ana.

* * *

**MSN conversation between William Darcy **(No man can remain in power forever.) **and Elizabeth Bennet **(In Sydney). 

**No man can remain in power forever**says:

Hello.

**In Sydney **says:

Hello. Er... if you don't mind me asking, who is this?

**No man can remain in power forever **says:

Will. Will Darcy.

**In Sydney **says:

Oh, riiiiiight. Hi. How are you?

**No man can remain in power forever **says:

Good... good... and yourself?

**In Sydney **says:

I'm fine.

**In Sydney **says:

So.

**No man can remain in power forever **says:

How are you finding Sydney?

**In Sydney **says:

It's cool. I nearly got run over by a car though.

**No man can remain in power forever **says:

Should I ask?

**In Sydney **says:

No. Definitely not.

**No man can remain in power forever** says:

Lol. I won't then.

**In Sydney **says:

Seen any good movies lately?

**No man can remain in power forever **says:

No.

**In Sydney **says:

Right. Okay.

**No man can remain in power forever **says:

Look, you're downstairs at the Internet cafe, right?

**In Sydney **says:

No, how on EARTH did you guess?

**No man can remain in power forever **says:

Just got lucky, I suppose. I'm in the penthouse suite with Ana. Would you like to come upstairs so we can continue this trivial conversation in relative comfort - here read as air-conditioning?

**In Sydney **says:

Erm... I guess... I mean, sure. Okay.

**In Sydney appears to be offline.  
**

**

* * *

**

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Jane Bennet:**

Hey J -

How are you? I'm fine - we're in Sydney at the moment. It's quite a nice place - though we do hear a fire engine at least once each day. It gets kind of depressing. But yeah. How are you? Have I already asked that? Yes, I've already asked that.

It just so happened that we're staying at a hotel owned by an old... acquaintance - for want of a better word - of ours. I'm not sure if you remember him, but we've been talking - and it's really quite strange. He's... nice?

Anyway, I'm raving. His sister is nice though.

Talk later.

Love,

E-


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: If you haven't got it by now, shame on you. This is the last disclaimer I'm going to write: I do not own Jane Austen' works **

**A/N: Guys, know this: I love you all platonically and _will _write review replies for this chapter. It's just that I've got an English Essay on Animal Farm on Wednesday and a math test on Friday, chem on Wednesday and biol on Thursday. In short I'm screwed and procrastinating. Whoo! **

**Chapter 23**

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse: **

Hey Em.

Last night I hung out with Darcy and his sister… they were very nice and all that. We watched _Phantom of the Opera _in their penthouse suite and Ana ships ErikChristine! And so does Will! HA. We're outnumbering you fop shippers. D

Today we're going out for lunch together and they're going to show me around. It'll be cool; Sydney's a great place. D

Oh, Will just came into the lobby. Talk another time? Bye!

Liz

----------------------------------------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:**

You're going out with Darcy and his sister? And you say you hate him?

'Nuff said.

-----------------------------------------------------

**Email from Lydia Bennet to Elizabeth Bennet:**

LIZZY!

I can't BELIEVE you're in SYDNEY. How UNFAIR is THAT? But whatever, it's GREAT over here – some HOT guys have come up for the holidays – remember DANNY? And GEORGE is here TOO! I BET you're wishing you'd come with me.

Send an email to Janie, will you? She's refusing to come out here to this party and you KNOW I'm not allowed to go if someone older doesn't go with me. Not that it's stopped me before, but STILL.

MWA.

Liddy.

----------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Emma Woodhouse:**

I do NOT hate him. But I don't like _like _him either. So shut up.

-----------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Lydia Bennet:**

Sorry Lid, you know Jane doesn't like going to those parties that you do. And it _is _2 hours from home. And the rules do hold. I suppose you could always ask Mum to take you…

-----------------------------------------------------

**Email from Lydia Bennet to Elizabeth Bennet: **

I HATE you, you biatch. As IF I would go with Mum. She's such a try-hard! Watch me, I'll get to the party, and THEN you'll be sorry.

-----------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Lydia Bennet:**

cough immature cough

----------------------------------------------------Email from Kernel Fitzwilliam to Georgiana Darcy:

Hey Ana,

Elizabeth Bennet? You're kidding me. Mwahahahaha… I do wish I could be there… oh well. You have fun with them, okay?

I can't talk much – I'm at work – but look after Miss. Bennet and your dear older brother. This should be read as 'make their lives hell'. Although I am having a very hard time imagining you doing that.

Oh well.

Miss you,

Ker.

-----------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Kernel Fitzwilliam to William Darcy:**

Dear cousin,

Do have fun.

- Ker

------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from William Darcy to Kernel Fitzwilliam:**

What on EARTH are you talking about?

-------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Kernel Fitzwilliam to William Darcy:**

You know, I know, we ALL know.

Now stop emailing me. I'm at work.

------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Emma Woodhouse to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Sounds like luuuuuuuuuuuuurve to me. Oh well, if you say so… Hm, when are you coming back to college? We're really missing you i.e. we NEED you to do our assignments for us. And when I say 'we' I mean me.

We've been watching romantic movies and I think I love _Ever After _all over again. We're watching this random one tonight with Gwenyth Paltrov in it. I can't spell her name. Oh well…

Em

P.S. I sort of forgot to feed your fish and it died. Do you want me to bury it or flush it down the toilet bowl?

P.P.S. Please reply soon. The fish IS starting to smell.

--------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Georgiana Darcy to Anne Elliot: **

Hey Ellie.

How are you? How's Tasmania? Cold? Sorry I haven't written before this, but I've been rather busy… okay, these are just excuses.  Forgive me? Hehe.

I'm in Sydney with Will at the moment and his crush, Lizzy Bennet. Have you seen Freddie anywhere around?

Do cheer up. The world won't fall if you stop worrying about it for a moment.

It might explode though.

Smile.

Ana

--------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Anne Elliot to Georgiana Darcy:**

Hey Ana,

Funny you should mention that, Frederick is staying in Tasmania. He's visiting his parents or something. I don't know. I haven't spoken to him – don't really want to.

I am NOT a worrywart.

Lizzy Bennet? Hm… I think I know her sister.

Ellie.

---------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from William Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet:**

Hey.

I hope you had a good time this arvo. Would you like to come out with Ana and I tomorrow? We're going to Luna Park. We're meeting up with the Bingley's. Charles is particularly eager to see you.

Will.

---------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to William Darcy:**

Sure, I'd love to. Thanks for asking. Say hi to Charles for me.

----------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from William Darcy to Charles Bingley:**

Bingley –

Lizzy is coming with us tomorrow. You don't mind do you? She also says 'hi'. Ana is looking forward to seeing you… and your sisters. Is Carols coming tomorrow? I'm sure there are some salons she might want to frequent. I've heard of this great spa place as well…

Darcy

-----------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Charles Bingley to William Darcy:**

Darcy –

Nice try. Even the spa held no appeal for Carols over you. Unless you want to accompany her to the spa? It's an idea, I suppose. But it completely defeats the purpose of her going there in the first place.

But Carols is determined to go to Luna Park. Especially since a certain Miss E. Bennet is going to Luna Park. She's always been jealous of Lizzy, did you notice?

Speaking of Lizzy, do you know how her sisters are? They were all such nice girls and so lovely. Maybe we should visit them sometime, hm?

Bingley

----------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Caroline Bingley to Louisa Hurst:**

Oh my gosh, that horrible _Bennet _girl is here. I bet she chased Liam across the country! I hate her. And I have to spend a DAY with her tomorrow? ARGH.

----------------------------------------------------------------------Email from Louisa Hurst to Caroline Bingley:

Don't worry, Roline, you've never looked better. But who's Liam? I thought you were hot for Darcy? But Lizzy isn't a spot on you, so don't fret.

--------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Caroline Bingley to Louisa Hurst:**

DON'T patronise me! And don't call me Roline! And Liam is Wil_liam_. D'uh. But I do appreciate the Lizzy comments. It's true, right?

---------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Louisa Hurst to Caroline Bingley:**

Of course!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

**MSN conversation between Emma Woodhouse **(Oh, Lizzy…) **and Elizabeth Bennet **(Hm).

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

So?

**Hm **says:

So what?

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

SO how did it go?

**Hm **says:

Why do you want to know? You don't tell me everything that goes on between you and George. Not that I want to know…

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

So you guys ARE going out!

**Hm **says:

Huh? What! No!

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

Well, you compared yourself and Will to George and I. And the logical conclusion would be that you guys are going out.

**Hm **says:

ARGH!

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

D That's why you love me. Platonically, of course.

**Hm **says:

You should go put your head into a basin of water.

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

Why…?

**Hm **says:

AND KEEP IT THERE.

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

But that would kill me – oh, I get you.

**Hm **says:

Kachink.

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

Hrumph. Anyway, you're going off-topic. HOW WAS LUNA PARK?

**Hm **says:

Alright. I had the pleasure of seeing Caroline Bingley flirt with William Darcy … and hanging out with Ana. Although the latter was much more pleasurable than the former. Oh, and Charles enquired after Jane.

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

He still likes her?

**Hm **says:

Yeah.

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

Oh … dear…

**Hm **says:

Yeah.

**Oh, Lizzy… **says:

Well?

**Hm **says:

I do wish you'd stop talking in riddles. WELL WHAT?

**Oh Lizzy… **says:

Are you going to tell her?

**Hm **says:

Nup. He'll just start messing with her emotions again. Jane doesn't deserve that.

**Oh, Lizzy **says:

I guess.

**Hm **says:

Hang on, I've just gotten a new email.

**Oh, Lizzy **says:

Sorry, Liz, I have to go.

**Hm **says:

Okay, bye.

**Oh, Lizzy **appears to be offline.

-----------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Jane Bennet to Elizabeth Bennet: **

Lizzy –

Liddy has run away with George Wickham. I know she's independent and all, but she's our younger sister. She honestly thinks George is in love with her – in love she has finally met her match. Mother isn't taking the slightest bit of notice, and Father is phoning all his contacts in Liddy's area, but you know that's not much, Lizzy. We need Uncle, Aunt and you. Please, Lizzy, come home.

Jane.

A/N: Incredibly short chapter, but it felt right to leave it there. Don't worry, they're not all going to be this short. I PMed all the great people who left signed reviews and said I was going to update this on Sunday. I'm sorry it didn't happen, but I got stuck. And now I'm back from camp and it was fantastic, but I'm exhausted. And to those who left anonymous reviews, I'm sorry I can't PM you, but thank you for reviewing. I appreciate it so much. )

**Cheers,**

**Sardine.**


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

**Email from Georgiana Darcy to Elizabeth Bennet: **

Hi Lizzy,

How are you? I'm sorry you couldn't come to dinner – Will mentioned something about … some prior engagement? I'm not really sure – he was a lot more taciturn than usual. Caroline nearly fainted when he snapped at her. It was amusing, in a sadistic I-like-to-see-people-get-hurt way. Which is what sadistic means, I suppose.

Are you still in Sydney? I wasn't sure, because I didn't know you'd left, but when I tried to go up to your hotel room, some old guy came out. I don't think you like older men, do you, Lizzy? I mean, there's nothing _wrong _with older men per se, but I think sixty years older than you is really pushing it.

I'm kidding, of course, and I hope you get this email. I'd like to see you again? Maybe you should come over for dinner or something. I mean, you owe us one, right?

Oh hang on … I don't think that's such a great idea, actually, because it appears that Will has vanished overnight! Maybe he's been eaten by the Bogey Monster. I'm joking again, of course. I don't actually believe in the Bogey Monster – it's ridiculous. He must have been eaten by the dust bunnies. They're vampirous, you know. Oh look, he's left me a note. I guess not, after all.

- about to read the note that proves Will wasn't eaten -

Ana.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Mr. Bennet to Elizabeth Bennet and Jane Bennet:**

Haven't found Liddy yet. Will keep looking. Tell your mother.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from William Darcy to George Wickham:**

Okay, smart guy, where are you, and how much will it cost for me to see you?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Elizabeth Bennet to Mr. Bennet: **

Told mother. She had hysterics. I'm not entirely sure why, because she didn't seem to care that Liddy had run away. I think her opinion at the time was "at least she's seizing her opportunities" or something like that? I'm sure it's nothing a couple of Midol or Panadol won't clear up. Or something stronger maybe, if she doesn't stop screaming in my ear.

Cheers.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Jane Bennet to Mr. Bennet:**

Hi Dad,

I passed your message onto Mum. She seemed a little distressed, but Lizzy was brilliant with her – gave her coffee or tea and biscuits or something. I'm not sure why, but by the time I came upstairs, she was asleep. At least she's resting, I guess, although I've never seen her sleep this deeply before. I guess she's worn herself out worrying for poor Liddy.

Good luck with finding her Dad, but don't wear yourself out, and make sure you drink lots of water and wear a hat in the sun. Do you know what area she's in at the moment?

Love,

Jane

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from Mr. Bennet to Jane Bennet and Elizabeth Bennet:**

Townsville. At the moment.

P.S.: Nice work, E.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**Email from George Wickham to William Darcy:**

Depends, what do you want? And what's the limit of your credit card?

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**A/N: **-nervously- Er … hi guys! –waves and backs off- Um … I've updated!! At last!! And …. – starts running as readers chase her - … I'm sorrrryyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!


End file.
